CUPHAZ

I can’t believe how easily I give up, I try so fucking hard. I have bottled up all of these emotions for too long. I don’t think I have ever cried this much. I don’t know what to do with myself anymore. I am such a burden. Why does an internet couple splitting up upset me so much? I thought it was possible for two people love each other unconditionally, but apparently not. I wish that diseases didn’t exist and I wish it didn’t take away the people that we love. I wish life didn’t hurt so much.

I am a broken soul.

There is literally an argument going on in my head right now. One side of me is saying, “do it you fucking coward, if you don’t, you’ll deeply regret it.” But another side of me is so fucking scared and anxious. I am always so fucking scared.

Always so goddamned scared.

I’m so fucking scared all the time and it’s holding me back from what I really want to do.

stability:

nothings worse than passing up an opportunity you know you would’ve enjoyed because of the fear of being judged

margaretgiraffe:

the moment you realize all that is holding you on to this 1500-lb animal is a tiny strap of leather, and sheer willpower

usually it’s the moment right before your ass flies into the arena wall